I AM NOT A WHISPER

I consider myself to be a very spiritual person. I believe that GOD can be very amusing (for lack of a better word) at times. I believe he gives us many chances throughout our lives to correct things within ourselves. One time in particular, he presented himself to me by giving me gentle nudges along the way. See, with this whole alopecia deal, I kept falling into a "whoa is me" phase. I did this off and on throughout the deal. I did this, so much so, that my self esteem plummeted to the ground. HE kept nudging me by surrounding me with lots of people who told me that they thought I looked beautiful. The more people told me this, the more I felt anything other than beautiful.
Outside of being a spiritual person, I also consider myself to be an intelligent person, proud and sometimes loud! During my low self-esteem phase I felt like two different women. I just couldn't process why I was feeling like this nor could I express in words that concept until a week ago. You see what was happening, was that although I knew that I was an intelligent person, there was this horrible self-image disconnect...cool words huh?...a new friend found those words...I felt like I had struck gold when I heard them.
Anyway getting back to the little nudges I was receiving from "THE MAN UPSTAIRS", I just didn't get it!...rewind to about 2 weeks ago. I was hospitalized for other health issues. While I was in the hospital lying in bed a women walked out of the bathroom. She was roommate. She was about 30 years older than me. Although she was obviously having some health issues herself, she appeared to be so meticulous in her style and dress. Every hair was in place folks! She even wore lipstick while she was in bed and got up very early each day to spruce herself up. She also felt the need to nurture me by helping me arrange the food on my tray to arrange things on my nightstand. She sometimes liked to go for walks in the halls. Well, my 2nd day in hospital, I spent most of my time focusing on either covering my bald head or lying in bed thinking how much I missed my hair. I got so depressed. A nurse talked to me to find out what was wrong. I told her. She said, "I'll be right back." The nurse came back in about 5 minutes, she said, "Did you know that someone in the hospital has alopecia like you? I told her, "No." She said well it's your roommate and that's a wig that she wears! My roommate came back into the room with tears in her eyes and said, YOU ARE BEATUTIFUL!...then looked me straight into my eyes and softly said, with or without hair. We are sisters and you're going to get through this stage. I know the place that you are at...and just like you, I was diagnosed with two types of alopecia." You see folks, GOD IS NOT A WHISPER!. He rains blessings down on you in a thunderous way! I think about that woman everytime I put on my makeup and cock my hat to the side before going out. Two, SNAPS!...and a bag 'o' chips!!!!...holla!