Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Thanks for Thinking of Me


I can't tell you how many times in the course of my day that people tap me on the shoulder and say" I thought of you today."

When I look into the mirror each day, I think of me too, but it's different from what others see. On most days I see a woman who is a work in progress...Always trying to find out what she needs to do to improve herself inside and out. I believe that one should make it part of their daily routine because it helps one to achieve their goals, fix what needs fixing, make sure things are in check, so to speak.

So when someone says to me in passing, "I thought of you today", I like to ask them "Why?". Recently, someone said to me, "I thought of you today because my friend is going through some hard times and has been feeling a little down because she's been ill. She's on chemo right now. My friend doesn't have what you have, but I thought she could relate to you because you seem to have accepted what has happened to you (referring to my baldness)."

WHAT? How does this relate to me?

When I asked, the person said, "Your story is inspirational in that it had to be difficult to lose your hair and somehow overcome it all. I couldn't have done that. It seems you have taken the bull by the horns, you've certainly made lemonade with no lemons." I said, "I lost my hair, and it was hard and I feel for your friend. But your friend is very ill and while I feel honored that you would look at me this way, I am so very surprised that you would relate to my story in this way."

If only I had a dime for every time that scenario has been presented to me...

Below are some other thoughts people have shared with me:

I thought of you today because I didn't have courage to shave my head for 20 years and I did it today. I feel liberated.

I thought of you today because I saw Robin Roberts on Good Morning America reveal her bald head on national television and she looked beautiful and courageous.

I thought of you today when my friend contacted me today and is being told that she may have scarring alopecia and she’s devastated.

I thought of you today because my mom has been receiving chemo and has lost all of her hair.

I thought of you today because my aunt wears a wig and hasn’t taken it off for years and I HAVE always wondered what was underneath that wig of hers.

I thought of you today because I relate to you so much. I’ve come to a place of acceptance since being released from rehab.

I thought of you today because, I am having a hard time trying to get through the day. My husband has been cheating on me and says that I am too fat. Your husband doesn't mind that you are bald and still loves you...If you can accept what you look like than so can I. I know there is someone who will love me for who I am.

I thought of you today because my 8 year old daughter has alopecia and is being teased at school.

I thought of you today because, my little girl saw a picture of you bald with a red dress on and wanted me to print it because she was so happy that the lady in the red dress looked like her.

I thought of you because I think that you should attend my workshop on hair alternatives.

I thought of you today because I would like you to attend the next center for disease control convention, they should know about your story. You should come with me...and the thoughts keep coming.

It's not just about me and only my struggles anymore. I have found that losing my hair isn’t just about me losing hair, it’s a gift that has been given to me to use as a tool to help inspire others to move past obstacles they are facing. Who knew?...Who knew that my bald head, my new identity, the very thing that I used to find so difficult to accept would be the very thing that would ultimately help to inspire others in their struggles in any way they choose to relate to my it.

So from this point forward, on the days that I continue to struggle with accepting the way that I look; be it my bald head or some other part of my body I feel needs some fixing;... I will think of the fact that there are people in this world who are thinking of me in a positive light. Now I can appreciate the person staring back at me in the mirror that much more.

What a wonderful gift my alopecia has been...and "thank you for thinking of me".